In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional, First Round:
1 Mario Hilario vs. 16 Eugene Heavy Runner: if I didn't already know a soccer player named Hilario, maybe we wouldn't have our second 1-16 upset of the tournament, but I do, and we do. Mario goes home and the Heavy Runner bounds into the Second Round.
8 Lovie Lilly vs. 9 Cetera DeGraffenreid: DeGraffenreid is another name that I feel like I would maybe get an inside joke on if I only understood some Germanic language (which I don't), but I don't really care for Lovie Lilly either. The weirdness advances over the blandness, and Lilly Lilly Lilly goes home.
5 Wisdom Bleboo vs. 12 Babu Chalamala: Babu!
4 Kyle Sackrider vs. 13 Oxide Pang: I almost spit up when I saw Kyle step onto the court. No contest.
3 Conceptualization Gibbs vs. 14 Anita Fiel: a vote Bart Simpson would be proud of. Anita Fiel, Round 2 is on the phone.
6 LeQuantum McDonald vs. 11 Jamarion Cavness: pretty evenly matched, but I'll give a little extra "e" for effort to LeQuantum for pseudo-scientific-ness.
7 Sa’Coby Carter vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: not a big fan of the apo'strophied names, while I AM a fan of classical (and classical sounding) languages, so Quantavius Maximus gets a pass on to the next round.
2 Maserati Jemison vs. 15 Brett Bucktooth: I've said it before, I'll say it again: sometimes people shouldn't try so hard, it's unseemly. Maserati goes home and the Bucktooth Bandit pulls off an upset!
Second Round:
16 Eugene Heavy Runner vs. 9 Cetera DeGraffenreid: Heavy Runner keeps on to the Sweet 16.
12 Babu Chalamala vs. 4 Kyle Sackrider: I like thinking about Seinfeld randomly, but the Sackrider it is. Was there really ever any doubt between a Sackrider and thoughts of a long, shamefully waving finger?
14 Anita Fiel vs. 6 LeQuantum McDonald: I remember seeing early Simpsons shorts in an 80s animation festival before their series debut. Loved it then, sometimes still like it, and am definitely looking forward to the movie. That counts for a lot in contests like this.
10 Quantavius Sturdivant vs. 15 Brett Bucktooth: it would feel a little elitist to advance Brett, like assuming he could use a helping hand because he probably never even heard of modern dentistry back in Bucktooth Holler, so I'm giving a leg up to Quantavius instead.
Sweet Sixteen:
16 Eugene Heavy Runner vs. 4 Kyle Sackrider: the Runner is out of gas and goes back home.
14 Anita Fiel vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: memories of (mostly) long-ago greatness will only get you so far, while pretensions can apparently float one on into the Elite 8.
Elite Eight:
4 Kyle Sackrider vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: The upper seed wins out, my manliness is assured, and we have another member of the Final Four.
Next:
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Dragonwagon Regional
In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional, First Round:
1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 16 Cynammon Burns: Yourhighness, and not for illegal affiliations, but more the obvious that's what we all at some time or other call the little ones (see 7 Princess Perdue below). I like cinnamon, but not really Cynnamon.
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 9 U Nu: you've got to be kidding me! This is basically a slam dunk in the end for me, but I will still admit that U Nu would have won just about every other face off. A damn shame to see this have to happen in the 8-9 matchup rather than further down the road.
5 Alibaba Odd vs. 12 Jazzmen Guy: neither one really excites me, so Jazzmen Guy becomes the next victim of the winner below.
4 Phyre Quickly Burns vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: this was another toughie, as I like the practicality of a parental admonition for a name, but they lose points for the misspelling. Ottilia Eycleshimer? I'm still not sure how that's spelled, so Ms. (?) Eyclewhatever moves on.
3 Adrienne Cumbus vs. 14 Nature Johnson: no one fools with Nature, not even for a semi-funny/sick double entendre.
6 Pinckney Pinchback vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Favorito, sounds like a used car dealer already.
7 Princess Perdue vs. 10 Co-Eric Riley: already got one member of royalty, so Co-Eric, you're the next contestant on....
2 Outerbridge Horsey vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: this is an example of the selection committee doing a poor job of seeding. Unless Outerbridge had to fight his/her way through a power conference, it's basically a pedestrian, albeit kind of odd, double-take name, but Leftonred Atanycorner is the easy upset winner here. I'll admit I've had a partiality to signs as names ever since my High School Mythology teacher, Mr. Ron Adams, told my class of an acquaintance (possibly apocryhpal) named Nosmo King.
Second Round:
1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 8 Destinee Hooker: it must be Destinee.
12 Jazzmen Guy vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: hello again, Ottilia.
14 Nature Johnson vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Joe seems alright, though generally I prefer to see upsets.
10 Co-Eric Riley vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: the 15 seed may be the Cinderella of the tourney so far as he/she/it dances on.
Sweet Sixteen:
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: another easy win for the Hooker.
11 Joe Favorito vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: ya gotta be better than alright to make it to the elite 8, and I'm giving it to Leftonred.
Elite Eight:
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: in the end Leftonred is a bit of a gimmick, not that they all aren't to some degree or other, but Destinee is clearly the thoroughbred of the region and moves on to the Final Four.
Next:
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional, First Round:
1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 16 Cynammon Burns: Yourhighness, and not for illegal affiliations, but more the obvious that's what we all at some time or other call the little ones (see 7 Princess Perdue below). I like cinnamon, but not really Cynnamon.
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 9 U Nu: you've got to be kidding me! This is basically a slam dunk in the end for me, but I will still admit that U Nu would have won just about every other face off. A damn shame to see this have to happen in the 8-9 matchup rather than further down the road.
5 Alibaba Odd vs. 12 Jazzmen Guy: neither one really excites me, so Jazzmen Guy becomes the next victim of the winner below.
4 Phyre Quickly Burns vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: this was another toughie, as I like the practicality of a parental admonition for a name, but they lose points for the misspelling. Ottilia Eycleshimer? I'm still not sure how that's spelled, so Ms. (?) Eyclewhatever moves on.
3 Adrienne Cumbus vs. 14 Nature Johnson: no one fools with Nature, not even for a semi-funny/sick double entendre.
6 Pinckney Pinchback vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Favorito, sounds like a used car dealer already.
7 Princess Perdue vs. 10 Co-Eric Riley: already got one member of royalty, so Co-Eric, you're the next contestant on....
2 Outerbridge Horsey vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: this is an example of the selection committee doing a poor job of seeding. Unless Outerbridge had to fight his/her way through a power conference, it's basically a pedestrian, albeit kind of odd, double-take name, but Leftonred Atanycorner is the easy upset winner here. I'll admit I've had a partiality to signs as names ever since my High School Mythology teacher, Mr. Ron Adams, told my class of an acquaintance (possibly apocryhpal) named Nosmo King.
Second Round:
1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 8 Destinee Hooker: it must be Destinee.
12 Jazzmen Guy vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: hello again, Ottilia.
14 Nature Johnson vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Joe seems alright, though generally I prefer to see upsets.
10 Co-Eric Riley vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: the 15 seed may be the Cinderella of the tourney so far as he/she/it dances on.
Sweet Sixteen:
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: another easy win for the Hooker.
11 Joe Favorito vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: ya gotta be better than alright to make it to the elite 8, and I'm giving it to Leftonred.
Elite Eight:
8 Destinee Hooker vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: in the end Leftonred is a bit of a gimmick, not that they all aren't to some degree or other, but Destinee is clearly the thoroughbred of the region and moves on to the Final Four.
Next:
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four
Bulltron Regional
In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional, First Round:
1 Intelligent Infinite Botts vs. 16 Taz Knockum: if it was "Infinite Intelligent" instead of vice versa, we might not have our first 1-16 upset, but it ain't and we do. Goodbye Botts, and hello Rock'em, Sock'em Knockum to the Second Round.
8 Tyson Mao vs. 9 John Bulcock: the apolitical potty humor of the Bulcock.
5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 12 Tekerrion Cuba: they both confuse me, but Michelangelo in a way that makes me pick him (5 part name!), while Tekerrion just makes me wonder what his mother was thinking.
4 Zaire Kitchen vs. 13 Mister Taylor: clever putting someone named after an African country and someone who sounds like he could rule one together. In these situations I go for the strongman: Mister Taylor subjugates Zaire.
3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 14 Windham Rotunda: not all body part names are good, but maternal ones with a lascivious aftertaste generally work for most dirty-minded people. Here it just has to beat the meeting room in downtown Metropolis's nicest convention center. Not much chance of another upset here as Gertrude holds serve.
6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 11 Remus Stefan: Zeke! You just have to kind of shout that name, with that sort of up-lilt you imagine prospectors in the Old West had when they shouted "Eureka!" Then Ezekowitz reinforces the lyricism. A pretty easy win for ol' D. Zeke.
7 Basil Hero vs. 10 Taiwan Easterling: no real reason here, just capriciously chosen Easterling to advance.
2 Ayo Yayo vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm going for the (presumably) little girl named like a race horse. It's Lady Comfort by a couple lengths!
Second Round:
16 Taz Knockum vs. 9 John Bulcock: the plastic robot loses to the wang.
5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 13 Mister Taylor: the real Michelangelo survived the whims of both Medici and Popes (sometimes both at the same time wikipedia), but X Ball Van Zee is sent abroad to "rest" while Taylor takes care of business on the court.
3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: Zeke!
10 Taiwan Easterling vs. 15 Lady Comfort: no real contest here, so no need for another horse metaphor as the 15 seed advances to the Sweet Sixteen.
Sweet Sixteen:
9 John Bulcock vs. 13 Mister Taylor: Taylor has to buy off the opposition this time, but a porn name like that probably didn't cost too much.
6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm a geek, so bad luck to the lady.
Elite Eight:
13 Mister Taylor vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: I'm still a geek, and I don't like despots and dictators, so I refer Taylor's case to the UN and put Ezekowitz into the Final Four!
Next:
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional, First Round:
1 Intelligent Infinite Botts vs. 16 Taz Knockum: if it was "Infinite Intelligent" instead of vice versa, we might not have our first 1-16 upset, but it ain't and we do. Goodbye Botts, and hello Rock'em, Sock'em Knockum to the Second Round.
8 Tyson Mao vs. 9 John Bulcock: the apolitical potty humor of the Bulcock.
5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 12 Tekerrion Cuba: they both confuse me, but Michelangelo in a way that makes me pick him (5 part name!), while Tekerrion just makes me wonder what his mother was thinking.
4 Zaire Kitchen vs. 13 Mister Taylor: clever putting someone named after an African country and someone who sounds like he could rule one together. In these situations I go for the strongman: Mister Taylor subjugates Zaire.
3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 14 Windham Rotunda: not all body part names are good, but maternal ones with a lascivious aftertaste generally work for most dirty-minded people. Here it just has to beat the meeting room in downtown Metropolis's nicest convention center. Not much chance of another upset here as Gertrude holds serve.
6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 11 Remus Stefan: Zeke! You just have to kind of shout that name, with that sort of up-lilt you imagine prospectors in the Old West had when they shouted "Eureka!" Then Ezekowitz reinforces the lyricism. A pretty easy win for ol' D. Zeke.
7 Basil Hero vs. 10 Taiwan Easterling: no real reason here, just capriciously chosen Easterling to advance.
2 Ayo Yayo vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm going for the (presumably) little girl named like a race horse. It's Lady Comfort by a couple lengths!
Second Round:
16 Taz Knockum vs. 9 John Bulcock: the plastic robot loses to the wang.
5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 13 Mister Taylor: the real Michelangelo survived the whims of both Medici and Popes (sometimes both at the same time wikipedia), but X Ball Van Zee is sent abroad to "rest" while Taylor takes care of business on the court.
3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: Zeke!
10 Taiwan Easterling vs. 15 Lady Comfort: no real contest here, so no need for another horse metaphor as the 15 seed advances to the Sweet Sixteen.
Sweet Sixteen:
9 John Bulcock vs. 13 Mister Taylor: Taylor has to buy off the opposition this time, but a porn name like that probably didn't cost too much.
6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm a geek, so bad luck to the lady.
Elite Eight:
13 Mister Taylor vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: I'm still a geek, and I don't like despots and dictators, so I refer Taylor's case to the UN and put Ezekowitz into the Final Four!
Next:
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four
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