Name of the Year 2007 Final Four (the Grinning Edition)

In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional

Which brings us back to here, at the Grinning Media Edition of the 2007 Name of the Year Final Four:

4 Kyle Sackrider vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: I've got to go with my heart over my lower regions and give the first spot in the finals to D. Zeke Ezekowitz.

8 Destinee Hooker vs. 1 Vanilla Dong: let's see, Sackrider, Hooker, Dong and Ezekowitz, notice a pattern? At least this time I have to resolve a conflict that presents a challenge, though in the end since I'm a boy I have to give it to the Hooker, right?

NOTY 2007: 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 8 Destinee Hooker: Destinee Hooker. What can I say, when it's practically carved in stone at birth?

Stuff mentioned, referenced, alluded to above:




Here's the other version of March Madness many of us will be watching for the next couple weeks.NCAA sitefree live stream

Chrotchtangle Regional

In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional


Chrotchtangle Regional, First Round:

1 Vanilla Dong vs. 16 Chanel Gemini: the Donger! The Gemini is just trying way, way too hard, yet ironically winds up totally outclassed.

8 Doris Morris vs. 9 Unique Grant: I guess it's kind of Unique, but not really that much when you look around at the competition. Somehow Doris Morris is unique here, so I'll take "Alliteration" for $600 please Alex.

5 Margharita Pigeon vs. 12 Bung Mac: I feel like maybe the 12-seed is some secret English or Aussie phrase I may understand if I travelled more than I do, so I'm sticking to form with the Margharita Pigeon prevailing on account of confusion.

4 De’Cody Fagg vs. 13 Chief Kickingstallionsims: another apo'strophool, and I'm wondering if this is the last year we'll see such a clichéed and potentially offensive representation of the Native Americansims tribe.

3 Gelo Orange vs. 14 Zhaneta Bozo: I like clowns, so it's another 14-3 upset!

6 Simpson Rushing vs. 11 Sasha Junk: I like history also, though admittedly I have some mixed feelings advancing Simpson to the next round, but in the end there's just not enough Junk.

7 Solomon HorseChief vs. 10 Demetria Crumbly: I'm not sure how to parse Solomon (the "Lawgiver") with HorseChief (maybe someone mixed their biblical action figures with their old Cowboy and Indian ones and was merely describing a tableau?), but however it works it moves on.

2 Thankful Vanderstar vs. 15 Ramarcus Dickerson: The fact that Ramarcus isn't that Ramarcable dooms Dickerson in the end. "Just be Thankful for What You've Got".




Second Round:

1 Vanilla Dong vs. 8 Doris Morris: as if it's not perfectly obvious already, I'm a boy and in situations like this, dick jokes win. No gong for the Dong as Doris has to call it a day.

5 Margharita Pigeon vs. 13 Chief Kickingstallionsims: I knew a Pigeon once, but I ain't ever heard of no Kickingstallionsims' in my neighborhood. Being a well-educated man, I reject the familiar and advance the unknown and presumably misunderstood Chief.

14 Zhaneta Bozo vs. 6 Simpson Rushing: Karma helps the Bozo beat the Simpson Rushing.

7 Solomon HorseChief vs. 2 Thankful Vanderstar: I like to think of myself as having occasional bouts of wisdom, but I'll admit I may regret advancing Thankful instead, but that's what I'm going to do.


Sweet Sixteen:

1 Vanilla Dong vs. 13 Chief Kickingstallionsims: it's starting to look inevitable as we get another tablespoon of Vanilla in the Elite Eight.

14 Zhaneta Bozo vs. 2 Thankful Vanderstar: it's not a big win for the Bozo, but a win nevertheless.

Elite Eight:

1 Vanilla Dong vs. 14 Zhaneta Bozo: Dong becomes my first Number 1 seed in the Final Four.

Next: The Final Four

Sithole Regional

In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional

Sithole Regional, First Round:

1 Mario Hilario vs. 16 Eugene Heavy Runner: if I didn't already know a soccer player named Hilario, maybe we wouldn't have our second 1-16 upset of the tournament, but I do, and we do. Mario goes home and the Heavy Runner bounds into the Second Round.

8 Lovie Lilly vs. 9 Cetera DeGraffenreid: DeGraffenreid is another name that I feel like I would maybe get an inside joke on if I only understood some Germanic language (which I don't), but I don't really care for Lovie Lilly either. The weirdness advances over the blandness, and Lilly Lilly Lilly goes home.

5 Wisdom Bleboo vs. 12 Babu Chalamala: Babu!

4 Kyle Sackrider vs. 13 Oxide Pang: I almost spit up when I saw Kyle step onto the court. No contest.

3 Conceptualization Gibbs vs. 14 Anita Fiel: a vote Bart Simpson would be proud of. Anita Fiel, Round 2 is on the phone.

6 LeQuantum McDonald vs. 11 Jamarion Cavness: pretty evenly matched, but I'll give a little extra "e" for effort to LeQuantum for pseudo-scientific-ness.

7 Sa’Coby Carter vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: not a big fan of the apo'strophied names, while I AM a fan of classical (and classical sounding) languages, so Quantavius Maximus gets a pass on to the next round.

2 Maserati Jemison vs. 15 Brett Bucktooth: I've said it before, I'll say it again: sometimes people shouldn't try so hard, it's unseemly. Maserati goes home and the Bucktooth Bandit pulls off an upset!


Second Round:
16 Eugene Heavy Runner vs. 9 Cetera DeGraffenreid: Heavy Runner keeps on to the Sweet 16.

12 Babu Chalamala vs. 4 Kyle Sackrider: I like thinking about Seinfeld randomly, but the Sackrider it is. Was there really ever any doubt between a Sackrider and thoughts of a long, shamefully waving finger?

14 Anita Fiel vs. 6 LeQuantum McDonald: I remember seeing early Simpsons shorts in an 80s animation festival before their series debut. Loved it then, sometimes still like it, and am definitely looking forward to the movie. That counts for a lot in contests like this.

10 Quantavius Sturdivant vs. 15 Brett Bucktooth: it would feel a little elitist to advance Brett, like assuming he could use a helping hand because he probably never even heard of modern dentistry back in Bucktooth Holler, so I'm giving a leg up to Quantavius instead.


Sweet Sixteen:

16 Eugene Heavy Runner vs. 4 Kyle Sackrider: the Runner is out of gas and goes back home.

14 Anita Fiel vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: memories of (mostly) long-ago greatness will only get you so far, while pretensions can apparently float one on into the Elite 8.

Elite Eight:

4 Kyle Sackrider vs. 10 Quantavius Sturdivant: The upper seed wins out, my manliness is assured, and we have another member of the Final Four.

Next:
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four

Dragonwagon Regional

In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page
Bulltron Regional

Dragonwagon Regional, First Round:

1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 16 Cynammon Burns: Yourhighness, and not for illegal affiliations, but more the obvious that's what we all at some time or other call the little ones (see 7 Princess Perdue below). I like cinnamon, but not really Cynnamon.

8 Destinee Hooker vs. 9 U Nu: you've got to be kidding me! This is basically a slam dunk in the end for me, but I will still admit that U Nu would have won just about every other face off. A damn shame to see this have to happen in the 8-9 matchup rather than further down the road.

5 Alibaba Odd vs. 12 Jazzmen Guy: neither one really excites me, so Jazzmen Guy becomes the next victim of the winner below.

4 Phyre Quickly Burns vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: this was another toughie, as I like the practicality of a parental admonition for a name, but they lose points for the misspelling. Ottilia Eycleshimer? I'm still not sure how that's spelled, so Ms. (?) Eyclewhatever moves on.

3 Adrienne Cumbus vs. 14 Nature Johnson: no one fools with Nature, not even for a semi-funny/sick double entendre.

6 Pinckney Pinchback vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Favorito, sounds like a used car dealer already.

7 Princess Perdue vs. 10 Co-Eric Riley: already got one member of royalty, so Co-Eric, you're the next contestant on....

2 Outerbridge Horsey vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: this is an example of the selection committee doing a poor job of seeding. Unless Outerbridge had to fight his/her way through a power conference, it's basically a pedestrian, albeit kind of odd, double-take name, but Leftonred Atanycorner is the easy upset winner here. I'll admit I've had a partiality to signs as names ever since my High School Mythology teacher, Mr. Ron Adams, told my class of an acquaintance (possibly apocryhpal) named Nosmo King.


Second Round:

1 Yourhighness Morgan vs. 8 Destinee Hooker: it must be Destinee.

12 Jazzmen Guy vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: hello again, Ottilia.

14 Nature Johnson vs. 11 Joe Favorito: Joe seems alright, though generally I prefer to see upsets.

10 Co-Eric Riley vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: the 15 seed may be the Cinderella of the tourney so far as he/she/it dances on.


Sweet Sixteen:

8 Destinee Hooker vs. 13 Ottilia Eycleshimer: another easy win for the Hooker.

11 Joe Favorito vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: ya gotta be better than alright to make it to the elite 8, and I'm giving it to Leftonred.

Elite Eight:

8 Destinee Hooker vs. 15 Leftonred Atanycorner: in the end Leftonred is a bit of a gimmick, not that they all aren't to some degree or other, but Destinee is clearly the thoroughbred of the region and moves on to the Final Four.

Next:
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four

Bulltron Regional

In case you missed the earlier episodes:
intro
ballot page

Bulltron Regional, First Round:

1 Intelligent Infinite Botts vs. 16 Taz Knockum: if it was "Infinite Intelligent" instead of vice versa, we might not have our first 1-16 upset, but it ain't and we do. Goodbye Botts, and hello Rock'em, Sock'em Knockum to the Second Round.

8 Tyson Mao vs. 9 John Bulcock: the apolitical potty humor of the Bulcock.

5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 12 Tekerrion Cuba: they both confuse me, but Michelangelo in a way that makes me pick him (5 part name!), while Tekerrion just makes me wonder what his mother was thinking.

4 Zaire Kitchen vs. 13 Mister Taylor: clever putting someone named after an African country and someone who sounds like he could rule one together. In these situations I go for the strongman: Mister Taylor subjugates Zaire.

3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 14 Windham Rotunda: not all body part names are good, but maternal ones with a lascivious aftertaste generally work for most dirty-minded people. Here it just has to beat the meeting room in downtown Metropolis's nicest convention center. Not much chance of another upset here as Gertrude holds serve.

6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 11 Remus Stefan: Zeke! You just have to kind of shout that name, with that sort of up-lilt you imagine prospectors in the Old West had when they shouted "Eureka!" Then Ezekowitz reinforces the lyricism. A pretty easy win for ol' D. Zeke.

7 Basil Hero vs. 10 Taiwan Easterling: no real reason here, just capriciously chosen Easterling to advance.

2 Ayo Yayo vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm going for the (presumably) little girl named like a race horse. It's Lady Comfort by a couple lengths!


Second Round:

16 Taz Knockum vs. 9 John Bulcock: the plastic robot loses to the wang.

5 Michelangelo X Ball Van Zee vs. 13 Mister Taylor: the real Michelangelo survived the whims of both Medici and Popes (sometimes both at the same time wikipedia), but X Ball Van Zee is sent abroad to "rest" while Taylor takes care of business on the court.

3 Gertrude Nipple vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: Zeke!

10 Taiwan Easterling vs. 15 Lady Comfort: no real contest here, so no need for another horse metaphor as the 15 seed advances to the Sweet Sixteen.


Sweet Sixteen:

9 John Bulcock vs. 13 Mister Taylor: Taylor has to buy off the opposition this time, but a porn name like that probably didn't cost too much.

6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz vs. 15 Lady Comfort: I'm a geek, so bad luck to the lady.

Elite Eight:

13 Mister Taylor vs. 6 D. Zeke Ezekowitz: I'm still a geek, and I don't like despots and dictators, so I refer Taylor's case to the UN and put Ezekowitz into the Final Four!

Next:
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four

The Real March Madness

Name of the Year 2007 (you need to get or at least look at the brackets here before this will make any sort of sense)

The brilliance of the Name of the Year concept is that it is like reverse Mad Libs, friend of long, boring car ride/trip sufferers everywhere, except here you start off with all of the funny parts, then have to work a reasonable narrative around them. In other words: very entertaining and silly.

I used to have the entire tournament here, but for brevity's sake, I've broken it up into the following sub-posts:

Next:
Bulltron Regional
Dragonwagon Regional
Sithole Regional
Chrotchtangle Regional
The Final Four

Robot Love

Seth Green is the man! I never thought I'd say it, but I can think of nothing more appropriate to describe the comic actor who got Adult Swim to bring us "Robot Chicken," a show that brings the toys of childhood to a semi-permanantly infantiized culture.

I love it, really I do, and what's not to love? Tonight's early episode, "Gold Dust Gasoline," had a Cannonball Run between Knight Rider's KITT, Speed Racer, Ponch and Jon of CHiPs, the Mario Brothers, Bo & Luke Duke et al, and a parody of "That 70's Show" as "That 00's Show" featuring the actual cast doing the voice acting, while other themes generally touched by typical child-hood play absurdism, the kind forced on you simply by not having all of any toy universe.


direct YouTube video link

The world of my childhood was one where my brother and I had one of the Dukes of Hazzard's General Lee replica Matchbox cars, but that's about all of note you could buy from that show that would allow you to otherwise pretend/play the TV show. So we certainly could have added in a 1960s era Batmobile we had no idea the origins of, plus the cyclically cool/uncool Mach 5, and then whatever else happens to be current like an A-Team van and we'd have races, or demolition derbys, make bad sound effects with our mouths, drove cars off cliffs, killed off entire casts if we felt like it, and generally just did whatever entertained us.

The world of childhood imagination implicit in the conceit of Robot Chicken makes for an incredibly flexible canvas to play off, as its twisted sorts of logic enable the overlapping of not just genres between film and tv, but eras as well. We used to have Matchbox or Hot Wheels cars doubling as the legions of Tie Fighters and X-Wings in a Star Wars battle, since our parents didn't have the budget to adequately reproduce the filmed version, or even a boy-sized small scale version. Not that really anybody much South of George Lucas's financial world would likely want to have thousands of toys like that, given that I believe they ranged in price from about ten to the hundreds or thousands of dollars for high-end replicas rumored to be available, but still we had to have more than one of each to have a real battle, so we improvised, and anybody who had ever done that would recognize what we were doing if they saw a filmed version of what was in our heads. That's the genius of Robot Chicken.

Of course that's obvious, since this was in fact most people's childhoods to some extent or other. But if it's so obvious, why hasn't it been done before? I mean, it's just stop-motion animation mostly, one of the cheapest, and easiest to get a basic level of proficiency at, using facsimiles of common childhood toys, brilliantly voiced by Seth Green and an amazing array of the best and brightest of contemporary American comic actors. Cheap computer animation helps further lower the production costs, but still this is the first time I feel like I can see my childhood on TV. Kind of cool, and creepy at times, and sometimes flat, but most commonly clever and plenty hilarious.

Proposal for Fair Use Extension for Online Usage

Was thinking about what I could do with my online posting that would really demonstrate my understanding of what the medium is capable of and where it should be going, and it became obvious that it was in figuring out some way to think differently about how multi-media content is included in the general narrative, i.e., how it doesn't just become dots on a screen instead of ink on paper, when those dots can do so much more. I obviously don't have budget/time to create all kinds of original content, just as most don't, which is why so many bloggers quote everybody and their brother at length, like junior high kids padding out their essays. Sure occasionally there are the blowhards like me who can ramble on and on about just about anything, even when they don't know anything about it, but the blogosphere is still dominated by liberal quoters. But you can't quote movies and songs like that. I would love to be able to throw a couple of bars from the Replacements "Bastards of Young"

in an article rather than just their corresponding lyrics:

"God, what a mess, on the ladder of success
Where you take one step and miss the whole first rung
Dreams unfulfilled, graduate unskilled
It beats pickin' cotton and waitin' to be forgotten"Full lyrics
but I can't.

Here's a link to current Fair Use guidelines for podcasters:
Podcasting Legal Guide: Fair Use Under Copyright Law and Its Application to Podcasts

This is why youtube and its brethren is really under threat, and why the negotiations between them and the major studios are so crucial to the youtubes of the worlds', and indirectly our, futures.

Here's my thoughts:

Proposal for Fair Use Extension for Online Usage

A publisher agrees to only use x% of material in its relevant medium down to a minimal level (varies per medium), and that material may only appear on some % of however you define the potential online universe, and should have some link to a range of commercial outlets for that product with its copyright owner, or contact information if out-of-print/unavailable commercially.

Details:

Recorded performances would have to have a minimum length to be eligible, as there would be no point in having a 5 second minimum for most sound-effects, making their inclusion commercially unviable. So a recorded performance would have to be a minimum of 30 seconds in length, contain at most 1/4 of the shortest commercially available version of that content, and be linked to the online commercial outlet of your choice for that content, either directly on the posting, or via an indexed page for that posting detailing the usage of copyrighted materials in the posting. The same sort of formula could be developed for each medium, eg. a still frame would be the smallest freely publishable snippet from a video recording, but only a fraction of an original still photograph, both with the same commercial linkage requirements.

The publisher's portion of the bargain is enforced by voluntary submission to some standard basic traffic analysis software system, like Google Analytics to verify that the system is not being abused by a commercial publisher. This strikes the balance between anonymity of recipient of a publisher's traffic while giving the aggregate numbers needed by the content owner to ensure that commercial opportunities are not being subverted by the agreement.

Does that make sense? Thoughts?

buy The Replacements "Bastards of Young" on

F-L-A his name is Ned!

E-R-S he is so white bread.
"Everybody Hates Ned Flanders" lyrics

Dude, Where's My Ranch? episode guide

(covers Seasons 13 and 14)

Yet Another D.O.A. Plan for Iraq

Bush Threatens to Veto Democrats' Iraq Plan Washington Post

Did anyone seriously think that there was going to be any response from the White House to the newest proposals from Congress regarding the Iraq war? At this stage of the game it is not really all that newsworthy that White House counselor Dan Bartlett said, ""It's safe to say it's a nonstarter for the president."

Mr. Bartlett, it's safe to say that ANY proposal from ANYBODY other than President Bush and (maybe lately) Vice President Cheney will be considered as a "nonstarter." Yet this is what passes for political debate under this administration: challenge the opposition to come up with a plan, knowing that whatever they are going to come up with is going to be a nonstarter, simply because the plan is developed at the wrong end of the Mall by people operating from the other side of the aisle, and not by "the Decider himself".

Can you imagine any other outcome? Mr. Bush maybe says, "Ms. Pelosi has some very thoughtful and interesting ideas regarding Iraq. I don't agree with all of them, and in the end it is my decision, but I respect the effort that went into it and will take it under consideration."

No, that will never happen. So we play the same meaningless game, yet again. As an illustration, try this: Google News Archive search for "Bush"+"nonstarter"+"Iraq"+"Democrat*"+"Plan"

Free-Fall for the Fall Guy

"Three reporters heard [Libby's wife, Harriet Grant,] say what sounded like, "We're gonna [expletive] 'em.""

They're gonna [expletive] whom? Cheney, Rove and Bush for making him the fall guy? Fitzgerald for prosecuting only Mr. Libby for what the Libbys believe is ultimately only a technicality in the end? The jury for having the temerity to convict someone so un-concerned about what the general public might think (and not in the honorable rebellious way of say "Wild One" era Brando), despite being in his mid-50s and this no longer being the 1950s, he publicly is referred to as "Scooter"? The dirty jackals of the Press for not lying to protect his lying?

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